We teach other people how to treat us. I couldn't agree more with this statement! We can take responsibility for our part in any abuse we are receiving from others. This way we can take back control from a "victim" perspective and see that we can change the situation and ourselves.
As anarcissist survivor, I know all about manipulation, control and emotional abuse. Growing up surrounded by narcissists was a challenge because I grew up thinking that this was normal behavior. I know now that it's not and it's a serious mental condition called narcissistic personality disorder. I immigrated from Poland as a small child and only had my immediate family for support and guidance. We were very poor and moved around a lot. My childhood lacked love, support, protection, sympathy and empathy from my parents as they were both narcissists that just kept taking and never gave anything back in return. This left me feeling like I did something to make them not love me. Or that I was somehow "unlovable" or unworthy of love.
When you are abused as a child you don't stop loving your abusers you stop loving yourself. It wasn't until after my spiritual awakening in 2018 that I finally started loving, respecting myself and taking my power back from my abusers. When I found that love and self respect for myself I stopped loving my abusers and had a major reality check. I cut them both out of my life & I finally felt free!
I believe that when we are not treating ourselves well or are not treated well by others, on a subconscious level we already know that. We need to bring this to our physical radar to be able to process and heal it. We can't heal anything without having awareness over it and we need to feel it to heal it. It starts by being honest and authentic with ourselves and having introspection into our lives, our situations and our past. Ask yourself:
“To look honestly at myself and be OK with what I see, what do I need to do, and what do I need to NOT do?”
Whenever you ask yourself that question make sure to listen to your true answer. From this you can then base your behavior from what you heard yourself say. Doing this regularly, will help you build up your self love, trust and respect. Why? Because this will be set up the foundation of all of your interactions, even if you are not aware of them consciously.
If you are a people pleaser like me, this may be a difficult change to make. As an empath myself I can tell you that we are highly sensitive, emotional finely tuned individuals. They are nurtures by nature, spiritually attuned, good listeners who are naturally giving to others. Because of this, you need to set boundaries with your own time, energy, resources and put yourself first without feeling guilty about it. You have to put yourself first and foremost WITHOUT feeling bad or resentful about it. Because if you put others first, your self respect and love will suffer as a consequence.
Your choice point is: what is more important to you? Liking yourself or having other people like you?
When you experience negative feelings about yourself like shame, guilt, or self inflicted anger ask yourself the following questions:
What can I do differently in the future, so that I can respect myself more in a similar situation?
What internal behavior may have contributed to my feeling this way about myself?
Can I be more gentle with myself and understand that making mistakes is part of the process and a learning experience that I can learn from?
When we step into our personal power and understand that we teach other people how to treat us. This is done by the way we treat them or how they see us treating ourselves- with this we can learn to change and adapt our behaviors to obtain healthier and different results.
Everything we can change resides within us: like our decisions, attitudes, and our choices towards ourselves and in our life experiences. Oftentimes we can feel like a "victim" when we don't have control over these aspects of our lives. The good news is: WE DO!
The next time you say yes to something you really wanted to say no to, be aware that you are teaching this person that it's OK to treat you poorly. When you are spoken to in a disrespectful manner and say nothing instead of standing up for yourself and speaking your truth- remind yourself that YOU CAN make another choice and teach that person to treat you differently!
Heal yourself from the inside out:
To heal these self love and respect wounds we need someone who can confidently, patiently and without judgment help us, step by step through the healing process. If you are in need of someone to talk with, I am available for online bookings thru my Skype: fromanotherealm.
I AM proud to say that I was able to find that self respect and love within myself despite not being shown any respect or love from my parents. They tried to break me, but I am unbreakable and it only made me stronger and wiser in the process. Remember respect is earned, not given. Just because these people birthed us doesn't give them control and dictatorship over our lives. I aim to use what I've learned with my past experiences to be a beacon of light and love for others.
Going through a spiritual awakening?
During an awakening, it may be useful to have some professional guidance: someone who can confidently, patiently and without judgement help us, step by step through the healing process. If you are in need of someone to talk with about triggers, past trauma, childhood wounds or repressed emotions. I am available for online booking please contact me directly at: fromanotherealm@gmail.com
Face whatever is holding you back head on and it no longer has power over you, you have power over it! Awareness and anything can't co exist. Awareness is more powerful than your ego, your emotions, your thoughts and your feelings. Awareness is what gets you back home to your soul purpose.
You can use your pain and turn it into power. If you are willing to work on where your pain comes from, the lesson to be learned and turn your knowledge into action, you can use your suffering to turn you into a stronger and wiser person! I look forward to working with you on your spiritual journey.
Love & Light,
Namaste ~ Paulina
Hello, my name is Paulina. I went through a spiritual awakening journey in 2018. I am in touch with my higher self and want to help you find yours. Until your higher self kicks in let me be your guide back home. Book 1:1 sessions with me: fromanotherealm@gmail.com#intuative #intuition #empath #empathy #lightworker #starseed #healing #psychic #spirit #chakras #kundalini #spiritualawakening #spiritual #kundailiniawakening #reiki #energyhealing #crystals #crystalhealing #enlightenment #consciousness #selflove #highsoul #higherself #lowersoul #spiritualhealing #reikihealing #fromanotherealm #fromanotherrealm
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